Dear my Baby Raven,
10:14pm, February 9, 2012. I am here in Brunei and your daddy is in the Philippines. I was praying to God about you when suddenly I thought of writing to you.
Kamusta ka na anak ko? Nasa tummy na ba kita or nasa heaven ka pa? hehe J
We’ve been hoping na sana nabuo ka na namin last week. Our hopes are getting stronger especially since yesterday I felt dizzy and light-headed. This morning I don’t feel my usual self again, I feel a bit dizzy and tired. Though, no matter how much I wanted to know kung buo ka na, I can’t, kasi di ka pa mad-detect ng pregnancy test. We still need to wait for two more weeks. Kaya eto, nag-d-daydream pa lang ako about you. Hayz.
I told your dad kanina that I feel dizzy pero sabi ko sa kanya baka over-acting lang ako. Hehe. Sabi nya, wag daw muna ako mag-expect at baka maudlot. Hehe
Anyway, it’s funny how some people can get pregnant very easily with one try while others can’t even with trying a hundred times. Recently I found out that a mommy’s egg only appears once a month and only lives for 24 hours. Then with millions of egg from a daddy, only one egg will be able to meet the mommy’s egg. Once they meet, then a baby happens. Isn’t that amazing anak? Ibig sabihin you're one in millions talaga! Hehe
Sometimes your daddy and I joke around. Sabi ko sa kanya, sana ung kulay ng skin, mata at pagiging cute makuha mo sa akin. Tapos ung pagiging smart makuha mo sa kanya. Hehe. Pero seriously, I like your dad’s eyes, very expressive, at deep-set. Sana ung mata nya ang makuha mo, wag ung sa akin. hehe
Even before your daddy and I were married, nai-imagine na kita. I imagine you coming in my office with your dad. You’re about 4 years old wearing your little maong pants and polo shirt. Then running to me, embracing and kissing me. Aaaahhh. What a sight? Wala ka pa, pero miss na kita :D
I’ll be honest with you my baby Raven, I am scaredL. Sometimes I wonder how I will be able to take care of you while you’re inside my body. I worry that I might get sick or I might eat or drink something that can affect your development. I worry that I might not give you all the right vitamins to grow and be born healthy and normal. I am scared that I might be stressed in the office, tapos ma-stress ka rin.
I am also scared about all the things that I will have to go through for you. Your dad knows that I am scared of needles and blood. The first time I took the blood check-up of your Ate Faye, I fainted. The last time a nurse took my blood for a sugar check-up, I also fainted. Having you will require me to go through a lot of that and I am scared. I am also scared about giving birth. Your Tita Joy said that the most painful is when they shot the anaesthesia. Your Tita said that it’s really a big big needle. Nakakatakot diba? L
But you know my baby Raven, I will go through all of that for you. If I need to take all the vitamins that my Doctor prescribed, then I will. If I have to drink milk three times a day, then I will. If I have to stop drinking coffee, then I will. If I have to be fat and have those stretch marks, then okay lang. If I have to bear the big needles and blood check-ups, then I will. I just want you to be healthy and happy.
In two weeks time, malalaman na namin if nasa tummy na kita or nasa heaven pa. But please be assured anak, that me and your daddy will do everything to make things perfect for you. We will make sure that my body is healthy for you. We will make sure that you will have a good, happy and safe home. We will love you the way God wants us to. We are very excited and we are anxiously waiting for you. Come to us soon.
Love,
Mommy
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